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I'm long married now to a non-geek girl who is not into gaming at all (and I don't care because I fucking love her EXACTLY as she is), but back when this advice was applicable to me I found that the better approach was to offer to run a one-shot as the GM for her and her friends where you were the host of a small geek dinner and gaming party.

It gives you the chance to impress on more than one level:

1) Cook something. A guy who can cook something delicious for a group of people goes up a notch in everyone's book (girlfriend and gf's friends).
2) You are taking charge in a good way. You are running the game, so you are acting like a leader. Leaders are sexier than followers. Just make sure that you are a good leader and that everyone has a great time.
3) You are doing something nice for her and her friends in a non-creepy way.
4) It is all on you. The game, the dinner, the location, your appearance are all under your control. This is a good thing, because it means that if things go well all the glory is yours as well. Make sure that it goes well.

One last thing that makes this a better idea than creeping into an existing group's routine - it will be at your place. You do a good job and the odds are much higher that the gf will decide to spend the night. Nothing awkward about it either, as it will just be a natural extension of the event once everyone else goes home. You know the drill: "Oh, I'm just going to clean up a little, but you are more than welcomed to stay. I'd love the company. Would you like a glass of wine while I finish up these dishes? Feel free to put on a movie if you see something you like."

Yep. Host an event for her and her friends and you'll see an increase in both your geek AND your boyfriend stock.

I would love to hear what the Girly Geeks think about this approach since my personal experiences may not match the norm, and the fact that I am no longer playing these mating ritual games (although making a really nice dinner for my wife on occasion is still a regular thing with me).


I think that is an excellent idea! It gives you an opportunity to highlight your best qualities. You get to spend time with the girl while doing something thoughtful and sincere with absolutely zero creep factor.

Those out there hoping to become the significant others of girly geeks should take note.

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